Monday, October 18, 2010
The other day, I was driving back from work with my friend in her two wheeler. I had to go to check out this house. Need to move. My friend offered me to drive me there. We took a de-tour from work as the main road is way to crowded at that time of the evening. We took the longer & emptier road. Since, one of the partitions was closed, we had to drive to the end of the road to take a U turn. That was the farthest I have been on that particular road, one of the sides has huge rocks/boulders & the other is sparingly spotted with trees. As we drove down the road, I had a weird feeling of De-ja-vu. The evening light & the empty road with its setting, reminded me of something. My nose flared up again & again to catch the smell which it associated with this setting. I kept trying to smell something that ought to have been there. But I couldn't smell a thing. I don't know what my brain was trying to pull back, which memory or rememberance that was failing to come up to the surface. I didn't say anything to my friend for I was at such a loss. I almost wanted to cry in desperation, I knew the setting too well in my head it was from back home but the smell was just not there. I don't even really know what I wanted to smell, but there had to be this smell that was supposed to be there & not finding it there made me rest-less. Not being able to remember what it should have smelt like, made me feel sad & old. Have there been so many of things to remember in my life that I have started to forget? I am only 28 this should not have been happening yet. I am supposed to be able to recollect things from back home. I am supposed to immediately relish things which resemble from things back at home. Have I lived far too many years away from home?